Special Interests line up to conduct backroom deals with Governor

Following the announcement of a deal struck between Governor Napolitano and the Homebuilders of Central Arizona, several other special interest groups expressed their desire to conduct secret dealings with the state’s top executive.

“At first, we were just shocked that she was trying to get anything done,” admitted one top executive, “For six years, she has pretty much just sat back and let things slip by. Imagine our surprise when we found out that she was trying to do something.”

The Governor’s secret backroom has been booked solid since the news broke that the homebuilders were able donate to thousands of dollars in financial support in exchange for preventing millions of dollars in impact fees. Other people are hoping to use their support of the Governor’s transportation and state trust land initiatives to further their causes.

“I’m going to donate money to the state trust land initiative in exchange for more money for railroads,” said Mike Smith, Chairman of the Model Train conductors association, “That thing is going to take all the money it can suck up. How are we supposed to build a scale model of the thing if it doesn’t have the billions it needs to be built?”

Other groups are hoping that they can piggyback on other pet causes of the Governor in an attempt to lighten their financial load. One group intends to fund a carbon tax initiative in exchange for an exemption for RVs used for tailgating. Another group intends to fund early childhood development centers in exchange for grants to continue their “guns for tots” program.

A spokesperson for the Governor expressed her surprise for the number of people willing to cut deals. “To be honest, we never really thought of getting anything done before now, but I guess we have to look back and at least pretend like we tried to get something done. If she would have known how many people would be eager to cut deals, she might have started trying to get stuff done a long time ago.”