Martin calls press conference to remind the media he is still around

Arizona State Treasurer Dean Martin announced today that he is still living in Arizona despite a noticeable lack of media stories about him. With Arizona is in the midst of an economic slowdown and Governor Napolitano and the Arizona Legislature are battling to make ends meet in budget negotiations, Martin wanted to make sure that the media was aware that, although he is not in the legislature fixing every bill, he is still as newsworthy as ever.

“I figured, this whole thing is about money, and I am in charge of the money,” said Martin, “I better let the media know that I am still around and working on things.”

Martin held up a giant check register in front of the crowd of on looking reporters and pointed to the balance line. “See this right here?” questioned Martin, “Balanced. And look, we starting to run low on money. We better be careful before we start cutting any more checks.”

The Governor called Martin’s press conference a “publicity stunt” and claimed that the treasurer was acting like “chicken little.”

Martin responded as he started to pull on a chicken costume, “I’m just saying, hey, don’t forget about me. If I wanted to be Chicken Little, I’d run around in this here chicken costume and tell people that the sky is falling.”

“Instead, I am wearing this chicken costume to promote the tasty new Famous Bowls at KFC,” explained the Treasurer, “You see, I am good at making the state some money. I signed a contract with KFC, and they will pay the state for every press conference that I dress up like a chicken. I figure, 2000 or so more press conferences like this, and I will have single-handedly fixed the budget crisis.”

After Martin took off the chicken costume, he began to juggle for the crowd. As the media started to head towards the door, Martin suggested that they bring out a couple of board games to play. He then started talking about movies that he had seen recently and what he would have done to make them better.